Wednesday, 25 February 2004
Attention: Oh-So-Subtle Metaphor Contained Within
So tonight's Picard meal consisted of colin d'Alaska à la parisienne accompanied by a bowl of steamed brocolis, pois croquants, courgettes grillées et tomates cerises. That all translates to "Alaskan hake in sauce" along with "broccoli, snap peas, grilled zucchini and cherry tomatoes." Readers will notice a certain hake theme turning up in my menus, thanks for playing.
But what, I asked myself while cooking the fish, exactly defined "à la parisienne"? Literally, it means "Parisian-style," but that didn't tell me much. Maybe it was the tomato-and-mushroom cream sauce? Who knows.
I didn't really have that much time to think about it though. After some three minutes of cooking, the plastic bag enclosing my meal burst open and hot, steaming sauce "à la parisienne" covered just about every interior surface of my microwave oven.
See, despite my best efforts, I hadn't been able to punch steam holes in the sealed package and was now reaping the rewards. After some swearing and much swabbing (on my part), the meal was back into the oven to finish cooking. About that time, it hit me: I knew what "à la parisienne" meant.
I can fairly confidently state that "à la parisienne" translates to "has a propensity to explode under pressure." People here certainly are occasionally less than mild-mannered, and I've unfortunately been both at the giving and receiving ends more than once. Hmmm...
It wasn't until after I'd finished my unexpectedly messy meal that I actually took the time to examine the box it came in. Sure enough, in the ingredients list, there it was: "champignons de Paris." So, the mushrooms are Parisian and thus the meal is so. I felt a little disappointed, quite honestly.
But I know the real truth, and now you do too.